SEIGE!

I'm waiting in my cold cell when the bell begins to chime
Reflecting on my past life and it doesnt have much time
Cos at 5 oclock they take me to the gallows pole
The sands of time for me are running low
-Iron Maiden

Jueves, Seis de Septiembre 15:31

The Storm before the Calm
Well, I've got Fripp back with me in Rockville, except that Rebecca's cat, Oscar, kind of an odd bean but a good cat, has declared holy Jihad. Fripp rests comfortably in my room, under the bed in case Oscar paratroops in, while Oscar does his interpretation of that crazy “LA LA LA LA LA Brrrrrrr HA!” stuff that they do in the Middle East, which ultimately just drives me crazy. Rebecca will be home about 18:00, and we hope that a formal introduction with the respective owners will chill things out. Fripp looks like he wants to play, but hissed when Oscar tried to throw his weight around (and considerable girth he has).
Time to call more insurance companies. Goddamn you George W Bush! I piss in your Ferrari!
I think Fripp will be fine. After all, he lives with a psychopath.

17:30
I'm really fucking tired, like in my toes. In my soul. I wonder how many years this whole divorce deal has taken off my life? Oh well, I guess we all die a bit each day. Some more than others. No matter. Some days I find the fountain of youth. Let's hear it for Ponce de Leon; Spaniard, religious zealot, and you can probably add in murderer and slave driver. But at least the Spaniards brought horses here. That's kind of an even swap, no?
I am so bitter today!!!!! Sarcasm will get me everywhere!
Have any of you ever listened to Tales from Topographic Oceans by Yes? Remembering High the Memory is awesome. I am finding my center again.

Cat Wars

Oscar and Fripp are currently in neutral rooms. Thus exists a fragile peace.
And it was morning
And I found myself mourning,
For a childhood that I thought had disappeared
I looked out the window
And I saw a magpie in the rainbow, the rain had gone
I'm not alone, I turned to the mirror I saw you, the child, that once loved
-Marillion

Upside In
I was in DC and tried to get my faulty MetroCard replaced for the Metro. It has frickin $75 on it and works like crap. I asked a guy who worked there and he said to go to Metro Center. It was one stop away and my card wouldn't work. The guy told me to buy a new card!!! I said “There's 75 bills on the thing, Jack.”

“Sorry,” he said. He really wasn't, cuz if he was he would have opened the gate.
“Yes you are,” I wanted to say.

I walked to Metro Center for exercise. There was a 20 minute wait. She asked for my license. Was it registered to me, she asked.

“I guess so,” I said. “Who else would it be registered to? I used to get MetroCheck thru work (free money for commuting and not driving, but I had paid half of it).” Plus it has my name written on it in black Sharpie. YES IT'S MINE YOU FUCKING TWIT!

She came back 5 minutes later. “It's not registered to you. Go home and register online and come back. NEXT!”

“You know, you really haven't been much at all,” I said. She never even looked at me. She looked like she was concentrating on taking a shit right there behind her bullet proof glass.
And this, my dear bloggee, is what happens when entire area of people are used to sucking on the tit of the Federal Government. What the hell are we doing? No one cares at all.
And why did beer prices go up since I was last home in January? Has the whole place finally gone bonkers? I knew the Federal Government was down the shitter with Shrubby in power (the sawed-off little bastard took more vacation than me this summer!), but it's spread to everything? Damn you, Confederacy!

You maniacs!
You blew it up.
Goddamn you.
Goddamn you all to hell!
-Taylor, Planet of the Apes

THE NEWTOWN LABOR DAY PARADE (9-3-07)
(About six guys dressed as Union Soldiers march by. Another six dressed and playing instruments are playing the Battle Hymn of Republic. Smith and I sit in lawn chairs while float after float goes by, hawking this and that.)

SMITH:Just like home, huh?
EL DUDE: Back home they wear grey.
SMITH: Ha!
El DUDE: But they're playing good cracker shooting music.
SMITH: And who's gonna argue with that?

If my heart were a ball
it would roll uphill
-Marillion

Viernes, 7 de Septiembre 4:48
Can't sleep. Fripp and I are holed up in my room hiding from crazy Oscar. Fripp didn't like Caleb (the German shepard) much either, even though Caleb ignored him.

REBECCA: Hey, before Fripp comes down. We should introduce him formally to Caleb.
EL DUDE: Okay.
REBECCA: Yeah, just so he realizes he's our cat and not prey.
EL DUDE: What???!!!!!
REBECCA: So he realizes he's not prey. I guess I should have told you that earlier.
EL DUDE: How many cats has Caleb eaten?!!!!!REBECCA: None.
EL DUDE: Okay. That's better.
Caleb was fine, but that whole exchange scared the shit out of me.
I feel like everything is collapsing in on me. I guess because it is. Oh well. I never promised me a rose garden.

When the dragons grow too mighty
To slay with pen or sword
I grow weary of the battle
And the storm I walk toward

When all around is madness
And there's no safe port in view
I long to turn my path homeward
To stop a while with you
-Rush

Fripp and I are both lying in bed. Fripp is licking his balls. That must be nice.
I feel like the USA has passed me by. Like I'm just in a different place, like I don't belong here anymore. It's not just Darth, although It is a major fucking factor. It's not just time. It's not just W Bush. Not just that I'm older and in a different place. I guess it's the whole enchilada.

Heaven
Heaven is a place
where nothing
nothing ever happens
-Talking Heads

PROFANITY
I was IM-ing the Seester today, lamenting the current situation, when I accidently used the S word and said Darth's real name.

SEESTER: Ugh! You named she who shall not be named!
EL DUDE: Forgive me Father for I have sinned. It has been 36 days, 11 hours and 13 minutes since I last sinned.

Haven't slept for days
in a million different ways
my mind twists in and out

Eat a soul
swallowed whole
- there never was a doubt

Soul stealer
I cast you out
-Wayward Platypus

Fripp slumbers off my left arm peacefully. He's my idol. He digs his creature comforts and loves unconditionally. Oh brave new world that has such pussys in it!

Lunes diez (10) de Septiembre

EPISODE XXVII – FUCKING HELL

IT IS A DARK TIME FOR THE RESISTENCE. PEACE TALKS HAVE COME TO A GRINDING HALT (WITH THE EMPIRE WANTING A $50K SWING IN WHAT WAS SHOOK ON) AS TIME RUNS OUT ON EL DUDE BEFORE HE NEEDS TO RETURNS TO PLANET MADRID IN THE ESPANA SYSTEM, WHERE HE WILL BE REUNITED WITH THE BEAUTIFUL PRINCESS MARIA (AND WHAT A NAUGHTY PRINCESS SHE IS – YOU SHOULD SEE HER EMAILS!!!!). IN A LAST DITCH ATTEMPT TO RESOLVE THIS DESTRUCTIVE CONFLICT, EL DUDE HAS LAID SEIGE TO THE GRECICELLO IN MCLEAN, HOPING THAT DARTH WILL SOIL HER IRON LUNG WHEN SHE ARRIVES HOME TOMORROW AFTER A FIVE HOUR FLIGHT WITH A 5 MONTH-OLD TO FIND HE INTENDS TO LIVE IN THE HOUSE THAT IS RIGHTFULLY HIS UNTIL THE CONFLICT IS SETTLED, POSTPONING HIS RETURN TO THE ESPANA SYSTEM IF NECESSARY. THE ENSUING DISTURBANCE IN THE FORCE IS EXPECTED TO MAKE THE DESTRUCTION OF THE PLANET ALDERAN LOOK LIKE A FART IN A BOTTLE .

You don't form in the wet sand
I do
-Red Hot Chilli Peppers