Fixed

A man needs a maid
-Neil Young

• right elbow recovering. I hope it is fixed. i have a brace and ice it down every day. I also am taking ibuprofena for the inflammation
• D0 i seem less flaming to you?
• Tonight is Bo's 30th bi-day party, with the usual set of lunatics, thugs and criminals. Should be a blast
• Tomorrow is the Stupor Bowl. Not sure if i'll watch it or not. I have to teach at 9am on lunes. ICK!
• I have started to watch the West Wing, which is really great.
• Time to shower, shave, clean, iron, shop, eat, ice my arm......
• Arizona will win the Stupor Bowl. I expect it to be fixed, so that Kurt Warner becomes the first man to lead two dif teams to victory, So take that Steelers!
  

Seriously. Do i seem less flaming?

Still Here!

All you need is love
-The Beatles

• I am alive, just busy with my new schedule.
• It was 12 C yesterday and felt like spring!
  
• I hyper-extended my elbow playing (Youch!) a horrible kit and will have to shut down playing for a two weeks. It sucks to get old. I have never been hurt in 18 years of playing drums!
  
• All else is well. The weekend is so close i can taste it.

Never

“People talk about 1,000 wins. I remind them that I’ve never scored a basket for the University of Tennessee.
-Pat Summitt, Head Coach, Women's Basketball, University of Tennessee.

• Bad El Dude! I have a crush on our 26 year old lead singer, Tamara. Scottish, ginger curly hair, great face, great bod. She is so totally my type. She usually stands next to me, off to the side, shaking her ass in my face. I love band practice! It's always dicey getting involved with other band members, (see: Fleetwood Mac, circa 1970's). Anyhoo, i'm trying to be good. She's a friend. We're just starting to write originals so she and i are working on some lyrics. And she seems fairly sane. I am trying to be good.

• I am trying to be good.

• I am really really trying to be good.

• I took the Night Bus home last night. I have to use that more. It runs after the metro stops and it's free for me with my monthly pass!

• I have re-injured an old nagging injury. About 5 years ago i separated some cartilage between two ribs. F*#king ouch! I think it was a mixture between carrying some heavy stuff and playing drums so much. But there's nothing you can do. It eventually re-heals itself. I can still play drums with it.

• I am trying to be good.

• I too have never scored a basket for the University of Tennessee.

• I am really really really trying to be good.

How am i doin'?
-Ed Koch, Mayor of New York City 1978 – 1989

• I just took a quiz on Facebook; Who were you in a past life? It said i was Joan of Arc!!!!! You mean even my past lives were like this???? Foul! Shennanigans!!!

  At least it explains my fear of fire. But God would never talk to me!!! He wouldn't slum to my level! Am i really to believe i was militarily brilliant French girl who got killed for wearing pants? And died a virgin? Fuck that!!!! Literally! I am deleting my Facebook Profile.

Making Space

I know I know for sure
That life is beautiful around the world
-The Red Hot Chilli Peppers

• I just texted Pedro to say i'd meet him at 4:30 for the game. He called back. "It's in Malaga!" We had a good laugh. I said we'd go to Malaga next time.
• So today is all about clearing space on my computer. I was wondering how it always disappears but i finally figured out that it was every Saturday when a new episode of 30 Rock downloads from iTunes.

Tour Dates!

Summer in Raincoats
March 14 - Chill Bill, Madrid, ES

Our first show! Should be fun.


Alright! 4.5 GB of space cleared. Now i need to clean up the external hard drive. It never ends.

Tales from Iberia

• I met Jessica for drinks. We went to EL Tigre, a place where they give you lots of tapas with a beer. After we had eaten, we left because the place is always a packed mad house. We were looking for a place and it was cold! Jess saw a door to a bar and said "this place looks mysterious". Let's go in here." We went in and there were all women sitting at the bar. The first one was just ugly, the second one had a skimpy dress, the third one was old. The fourth was a washed-up old whore. And then it hit us - whore house! The washed up old whore gave Jess a smile and Jess grabbed my arm. Now Jessica is really hip, but has a kind of striaght-laced side too. "This is a naughty place!" She cried and said "Let's go." By now the working girls are snickering. By the time we hit the street i was laughing out loud. "You called a whore house a 'naughty place.' You said it like you were my mom and then grabbed my hand!" It was hysterical
• Later we were at a bar where the bartender had the inscription of the One Ring, from the Lord of the Rings, tattooed on his chest. I swear. I think that counts as satanism.
  

Letters from Belize

I'm on a bridge to better days
-Joe Bonamassa

Work done. Happy Weekend! Jams tonite and tomorrow. Busy busy.

My old friend Edward (who was my neighbor in some far away place called McLean, which i don't think ever really existed, except maybe for me) lives in Belize and is starting a private elementary school! Nuts! He's got a long way to go in this process, but threw out the idea of me being on the staff and teaching there. I would be way interested, but for now it's just a pipe dream. I've put down roots here. I have a lot of friends and the two bands But they speak English and Spanish in Belize which is a plus. Edward and i always talked about starting a business and this would be in the Caribbean, so all of these things are enticing.

The wheel in the sky keeps on turning
don't know where i'll be tomorrow
-Journey

Listening to:

smells like glue - the adults
shiver - john wesley
live from nowhere in particular - joe bonamassa
the stranger inside - richard barbieri
live in hyde park - red hot chili peppers
counterparts - rush
the shake your wet umbrella demos - summer in raincoats

Tres Cantos

Polarize me
Sensitize me
Criticize me
Civilize me
Compensate me
Animate me
Complicate me
Elevate me
-Rush

Well, yesterday was an exciting day. Today too. Everyone is all geeked up about Obama. I was making copies before class and asked a women to borrow her scissors. "She was like 'You're American!'" Just so happens she's from London. I talked with her and two of her colleagues about the inauguration. The excitement is running high.

He's got a lot of work to do, the poor bastard. You couldn't pay me enough to take that job. I heard he is trying to stop smoking. A lot of smokers smoke because of stress. Good luck with that too!

I picked up 6 more hours a week and got Celia (the company that was formerly my boss, Lyndsay Buckingham) to give me more money to go up north to Tres Cantos (three songs) every night. Yee ha! I'm such a whore!

Number 44

All fall together
A black sky in the rain
And you can laugh and I will sing
We've changed forever
-Big Country

• Revolutionary Road with Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio is amazing. Sad and awful. But amazing because it's so damn real. It's a standout.
  
• The scariest moment of the new year so far was when Chema walked into the house while i was hanging laundry and belting out Sinead O'Connor's Nothing Compares to You, with my iPod earbuds in. We've both agreed complicitly to never speak of it again.
• Congrats President Obama. Now YOU are a true maverick. Sarah Palin wouldn't know a maverick if it was standing on top of an igloo.
• Got a call from the Mum during the Inauguration, which was sweet.
• Let us hope there are better days ahead
  

Adios! (part 3)

"They misunderestimated me."
Bentonville, Arkansas, 6 November, 2000

And your thieving magpie brother Jeb! I'll never understand why somebody neutral wasn't watching over the 2000 Florida election when his brother was Governor.

Finally, the last day of Bush. I hope we learn from our mistakes. Another president like him and the whole world could end. Things are bad. But we are a great country. I believe we can be great again. Or at least financially solvent.

I had the Cards, but I didn't have Pitt. I absolutely despise the Steelers (see Super Bowl XL; first fixed Super Bowl).

I am taking the Cards.

A few classes have been cancelled so i am working on getting new ones. I may have to travel more, but i'll figure something out. I always do. I really don't understand how that works, though. I guess it's a glass of relentless optimism, with a few leaves of networking, a spoonful of good luck and a dash of stupidity.

"Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out."
- American Traditional

Attack of the clones

It would be a mistake for the United States Senate to allow any kind of human cloning to come out of that chamber."
Washington DC, 10 April, 2002

Great jam last night. We have like 6 tunes now. The parties were fun. EVERYBODY was out last night. Tonight it's the Philly - Ariz game at Dubliners. Then bed.

I know a lot of strange people here. Some are fun, some are nuts, some walk the fine line in between. Australians, English, Scotts, people from all over the US. I guess if you choose to be an expat you have to be a little odd.

Excepting me. I am totally sane.

As long as a clone never comes out of the Senate's chambers, i think i'm good.

Lovely

"I want to thank my friend, Senator Bill Frist, for joining us today. He married a Texas girl, I want you to know. Karyn is with us. A West Texas girl, just like me."
Nashville, Tennessee, 27 May, 2004

Great jam last night with Band B. We are working on band names. Same time table to play out, like maybe April. Tamara is growing in confidence. What a set of pipes! We had beers afterwards and are starting to gel as a group. I feel really comfortable with all our songs now.


It's 10 C today. Hooray!!!! And nice and sunny.

Obvious Question

Because he's hiding." --George W. Bush, responding to a reporter who asked why Osama bin Laden had not been caught, aboard Air Force One, Jan. 14, 2005


Weekend!

Jam tonight with band B.

It got all the way up to 8 C today. Yeah!

I spent a lot of the afternoon correcting Terminator Girl's essay for her MBA entrance exams. Don't ask me why a cyborg needs an MBA. Maybe the economy is no better in 2029.

Tomorrow the other band jams at 6. We got a few songs;

Something Happened
Pipe Dreams
So over you
Cornered

I wrote the lyrics for the first 2, Lee and i collaborated on the 3rd and Lee wrote the 4th. Juan writes all the music. He's incredible.

Lee and Juan have been investigating gigs. I have a contact through Mercedes, but that's a bigger bar so we should do some smaller gigs first. The marketing machine is gearing up. A Facebook page is up. So it looks like we're on target for March. Boo Yeah!

Then there are 2 parties and i might meet up with Bettina. Her last email was IMPOSSIBLE to understand. Thankfully American Laura helped me translate it. Interspecies dating is a bitch!

"All I can tell you is when the governor calls, I answer his phone."
George W. Bush, San Diego, California, 25 October, 2007

Welcome to the Monkey House

"I'm gonna talk about the ideal world, Chris. I've read -- I understand reality. If you're asking me as the president, would I understand reality, I do." --George W. Bush on abortion, MSNBC's "Hardball," May 31, 2000

• Chema went to Jaen so i have the flat to myself until Tuesday! Woo hoo! It's been a bit cleaner lately cuz Anita has been on Chema. So i'll be able to get the place downright respectable over the next few days. Praise Jah!
• The other day she was reprimanding him for stockpiling dishes in the sink and used his full three names (everyone is hyphenated with the Father's and then Mother's last name). I was in the kitchen cooking breakfast and just started to giggle it was so funny. Then they laughed because they were like - holy cow! He understands us!

Welcome to the monkey house.
- Kurt Vonnegut

Parental Guidance

"I think we agree, the past is over." --George W. Bush, on his meeting with John McCain, Dallas Morning News, May 10, 2000

Sweet baby Jar Jar Binks!!!! Yale and Harvard Business must be cringing! My left sneaker has more intelligence and that's the one that has crusty old dog poo on it!

I bet now old man Bush wishes he had whacked Jr. while he was still head of the CIA. Missed opportunities!

* * *

Listening to;

Crimson Jazz Trio - Songbook
Pink Floyd - Animals
Rush - Snakes and Arrows
Gordion Knot - Emergent

***

It's still very cold here, but it's the weekend! Still full of snot but more time to sleep. All else is status quo. I have jams tomorrow and sabado. Time to make some stir fry gambas and then meet Cara and hear her tales from Portland and Montana over the break. Fire turbines, full speed ahead!

I'd make a great fucking mother!
-Clementine, The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Devil Cure

"And truth of the matter is, a lot of reports in Washington are never read by anybody. To show you how important this one is, I read it, and [Tony Blair] read it."
George. W. Bush, On the publication of the Baker-Hamilton Report (assessing the state of the war in Iraq), Washington DC, 7 December, 2006

Well, at least we know he can read.

I am getting better but the cure is as bad as the disease. You really feel like hell as this technicolor snot leaves your system, 1,000 tissues later. If I was vampire i'd never get sick. I haven't been sleeping well (wouldn't have to worry about that either if i was a vamp) but class got canceled today (with pay!) so i went back to bed. And man did i sleep. When you lower the shutters my room is like a cave. A bone dry cave. But i shall be back on my feet by the weekend.

*****

I am becoming more and more psychotic. I mean psychic. Sorry. You knew about the former.

I think about something and then it happens. I think about someone and then i get news about them the next day. But i can't control it. I never know what it means until it happens. What good is that?

Am i evolving, like the X-Men? If i was a mutant that would explain 40 years of questions.

Holy sh*t! What if that's what Terminator Girl wants with me!!!! What if i'm a missing link? I see her tomorrow. I'm just going to ask her straight out. Then I'm going to melt her down into a cigarette lighter.

I think the antibiotics are messing with my head now.

Release me!
-Pearl Jam

Clearly

"It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it."
George W. Bush: Reuters, 5 May, 2000

One more week and Shrubby is gone! Until then, relive the madness sight here.

Terminator girl called. She has her test on Saturday, so i told her i would help her on Miercoles. I have to find out what she REALLY wants from me. Then i'm going short circuit her with a tampered microwave take her to the woods and melt her futuristic alloy with flares and hydrochloric acid. How many pharmacies do you think i'll have to go to before one gives me hydrochloric acid?

Unless she was sent to protect me? I f*#king hate time travel paradox. But she's definitely a machine. If the boobs don't fit...

Most disturbingly, the following conversations all actually took place.

BO-Dude what is up with Monica, she was all over you last night. Thant girl can't keep her hands off of you.EL DUDE- You know i thought that was kind of odd. You think? I'm so used to Spanish women being all paws.BO- Dude, that girl is always all over you. Do you like her?
EL DUDE- Man, she lives with her boyfriend! He was there! That was THEIR house!
BO- Are you serious?
EL DUDE-Yeah, Fernando is her boyfriend.
BO- No shit. Wow, and he's a good looking guy too. Surprising.
EL DUDE- Are you saying I'm not good looking?
BO- No, he's just really good looking.
EL DUDE- Alright, now you're scaring me.

(This was a 2^nd New Years Party since we were all away. You picked a number out of a hat and then fed the other person grapes, for good luck)

BO- I had a big scary man putting grapes into my mouth. Who were you paired with?
EL DUDE- Monica.(Pause). Oh man...., do you think...
BO- Aw Dude, she totally rigged it so she could put grapes in your mouth!

(at this point our whole table, the rest all girls, cracks up.)

EL DUDE:-Ahh man. I'm putting it all together now. She said to me “You're a really cool guy,...and i mean that in a non-sexual way.” Dude you don't say that unless....

THE ENTIRE TABLE: You mean it in a sexual way!

(more laughter)

Great. The gal who lives with her boyfriend is hitting on me. Wonderful. No freaking thank you!

Last Thursday -

BO- So, Juan, is this girl Jay met at your party hot?
JUAN- Oh yeah. Bettina's very beautiful.
BO- Is she insane?

I love how that was the 2^nd thing he asked. Thanks a lot. So much to look forward to in '09. Psycho women and killer robots. It's going to be a hell of a year.

And now the hard part...

"You know, one of the hardest parts of my job is to connect Iraq to the war on terror."
George W. Bush, CBS News, Washington DC, 6 September, 2006

• Oh, the Giant game was bitter. Bo, Louise, Jess, Sarah and I all watched it at Dubliners. It was a rough way to go out. But this game scared me from the beginning. The Eagles are peaking at the right time.
  
• Arizona is hosting the NFC Title Game? Has the world gone mad?
• Work starts in earnest tomorrow with a whole slate of classes. Hooray!
• Well, my battle with the flu over the holidays ended with scarily bright colored snot, which means a nasal infection. I'm good for at least one a year. The fourth pharmacy i tried gave me amoxicilina, so i hope to make a speedy recovery. At least i didn't have to pay to see a doctor. You can get anything you want in Madrid if you just keep trying.
• The Atletico game was no better than the Giants. At least it started at 17:00 so it wasn't too cold. Atletico lost 3-2 to Athletic Bilbao, the third goal coming on a very soft goal allowed by Leo Franco. The game had to be stopped several times because the Atletico South endzone ( i sit in the north end where there were no such incidents) was pelting the rival keeper with snow balls. People are idiots in Spain just like in the USA. It was snow that hadn't melted from Friday.
• I made veal tonight. Not bad, but it needs work. Maybe breading and spices next time.
  
• Sleepy time.
  

Some Smart Person

"I'll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office."
George W. Bush, Washington DC, 12 May, 2008


I may not be a genius but i'm certainly smarter than him. Then again, so is a door stop. I'm going to go way out on a limb here and say that history will judge Shrubby rather harshly. 9/11 allowed the lunatics to run the asylum for 8 years.

After a 2 month hiatus i am back to work on the novel. It's always daunting to jump back in and you see how many threads you need to write and just start imagining the rewrites! It's enough to make you want to yak. But you get through it. I cracked the 70,000 word mark today. One little victory.

No Childs Left Behind

(below: Asleep at the wheel)



"Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?"
-George W Bush, Florence, South Carolina, 11 January, 2000

And for good reason! Mercy! Shrubby makes the same singular/plural mistakes my Spanish beginner students struggle with.

• I have begun looking at second hand drum kits. I can't do electronic, i've decided. Real drums are just where it's at. I love them! Big one's, little one's, medium one's. And cymbals! I love them too! I can store them downstairs in the storeroom. Juan has a friend with a big car who can help us get them to gigs.

• The jam went well Thursday night. Songs are starting to gel. Some of the hip-hoppy funk stuff we've been doing allows for some really fun tribal beats and the use of a lot of toms. Which i also love! These guys are a lot of fun to play with. Our bassist just switched to bass, so that makes my job a bit more interesting! But it's good because it makes me focus on just keeping a good steady beat.

• Snow. Snow in Madrid. I don't believe it. I'm going to the market. That will make it real. It must be chaos out there!

• The snow was nothing. It's all gone. It just really stuck to trees, grass, our terrace, etc. The streets are all clear. But Juan said it took him 3 hours to get home by car!

• Football Picks: Baltimore, San Diego, Carolina, New York. But i have to say; I am worried about the Giants game. I think the Eagles will play them tough, but i still say the G-men win. I hope.

As people do better, they start voting like Republicans - unless they have too much education and vote Democratic, which proves there can be too much of a good thing. -Karl Rove

Nieve

"I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully."
George W Bush, Saginaw, Michigan, 29 September, 2000

Time travels by so fast. With Facebook, i have chatted with Little Boy Burnt in Long Island and My friend Bernadette from grammar school! The planet has shrunk to the size of a pea.

I chatted via video chat with my Aunt Nunnie, 88, on Thanksgiving. She said in her xmas card that it 'boggled her mind.' She's not the only one. So, to put it all in perspective, i am dropping some missives in the mail and sending them the old way, like we did in prehistoric times. Just to remind you of what it was like.

God bless you Al Gore for inventing the Internet!!!!

And now it is snowing and sticking in Madrid. First time in 3 winters. I don't believe my eyes. The Madrillenos are going to sh*t themselves.

WORLD WITHOUT STINGING INSECTS

• Atleti was on the ass end of an ass kicking as Barcelona rolled them 3 -1 on three goals by Lionel Messi, arguably the best player in the world. For my money, he is. The return leg of this Copa del Rey match is next week at Camp Nou. It just gets worse and worse.

• To celebrate my two years of teaching, i am giving the people what they want; an article about the effect of cocaine on bees. Sounds like a nightmare! I fucking hate bees.

Who in the name of hell gets the budget approved for these things! People are starving all over the country but we fund a guy who gets his jollies out of coking up bees! They put it an eyedropper in liquid form and drop it on the bee's back. I am completely frigging serious here. It's in the NY Times! They say it has the same effect on bees as humans. Who cares? We know what it does to humans!!! Did you think it was going to be something different for bees? Hey, it makes you hyper and aggressive. Let's give it to some stinging insects! That's just brilliant. I have no doubts that we will be our own demise.

Can i play with madness?
-Iron Maiden

• My boss, Lyndsay Buckingham, is leaving PLT. It's a shame because she was a great boss and easy to work with. She thanked me for being one of her best teachers, which was sweet. We'll stay in touch but i'll miss working with her. And she has the coolest name ever.

The wheel in the sky keeps on turning
don't know where i'll be tomorrow
-Journey

• It's 2009. It's sounds like a joke. Like the year apes take over the planet in one of those sequels!

• It's -2 C at 22:00. That's unheard of here. We've been hit with a blast of cold air from Siberia. Fucking Ruskies. First Putin cuts back the gas for Europe, now freezing air. Can't we all just get along?

Listening to:

Suzanne Vega – Live at the Stephen Talkhouse

Cream – Live at Albert Hall

Rolling Stones – Sticky Fingers

Joni Mitchell – Turbulent Indigo

Pink Floyd – Animals

Mark Knopfler and Emmylou Harris – All the Roadrunning

Djam Karat – Live at Orion

Big Country – Restless Natives

Cheap Trick – Greatest Hits

Dire Straits – Dire Straits

• The band is practicing tonight (Summer in Raincoats) so it'll be good to have all the boys back together. Band B practices next Friday.

• Back to normal. The holidays are great but it gets kind of disorienting after two weeks.

• There are times in his life when a man just needs to sit down and eat a whole chicken. Like last night.

• Fucking Siberia! It is so cold. But the stars are amazing on the terrace. Until frostbite kicks in.

• I got a new winter coat. It's a long black wool one. They have great sales this time of year (Rebajas). My leather jacket started peeling last year after i got it dry cleaned. I got it cleaned after Guinness, Rebound Girl's cat, peed on it. Cause and Effect. Cause and Effect. So i needed a new jacket for work and all. It's really nice, made in Portugal, and it was pretty cheap for such a nice coat. A long coat will come in handy. I spend a lot of time outdoors walking from place to place.

"There's an old saying in Tennessee - I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee - that says, fool me once, shame on... shame on you. Fool me - you can't get fooled again."
George W Bush, Nashville, Tennessee, 17 September, 2002

Dos Anos

It was still September
When your daddy was quite surprised
To find you with the working girls
In the county jail
I was smoking with the boys upstairs
When I heard about the whole affair
I said "oh no William and Mary wont do"
Well I did not think the girl
Could be so cruel
And I'm never going back To my old school
-Steely Dan

Two years ago i arrived in Madrid with nothing but a suitcase and a wing and a prayer. My brain was overloaded and fried. I was going through a divorce and wondering if Annie was my child or not. I left everything i knew behind (except my friends and family whom i carry in my heart wherever i go).

And i lucked out. 2 years later, here i am. Now i have a bunch of friends from Spain, all over the US, England, Ireland and Scotland. I love teaching. I play in 2 bands. And i have no children!!!!! Somehow everything worked out and for that i will be forever grateful.

I've been thinking more and more that i would love to be a Papi someday. But it would be really sweet to be in love with the woman who was having our child! Something to look forward to. But for now, it's time to celebrate the little victories.

One never knows, do one? -Nana

The bad news first....

Time, if nothing else, will do it's worst
So do me that favor
And tell me the good news first
-Rush


The bad news is that the number Andrea punched into my phone on Friday doesn't work. It says agotado (exhausted). I have heard lots of Spanish chicks give guys wrong numbers, but she seemed so adamant about me calling her. Maybe she was just drunk. I may run into her at that same bar again.

C'est la vies.

The good news is that Juan's party at this bar was great. The owner is Spanish but grew up in Ridgefield NJ. What are the odds?

Anyway, i bet this Bea - u- tiful gal named Bettina. She's a neural psychologist. I bet that would be handy to have around! And i believe she's close to my age. We'll see what happens next. We exchanged Facebook info today. She asked me if i was on Facebook first, so we'll see. It's hard to read these Spanish women. It's most likely hard to read MOST women. Won't someone just spell it out for me?

Strange but True

Theres so many different worlds
So many different suns
And we have just one world
But we live in different ones
-Dire Straits

• So now Brett Favre is talking about retirement again? If he says it one more time i think he should be euthanized. I'll do it myself. It's obvious he's lost all reason. And he's left the Jets with a train wreck, whether he comes back or not. The guy is an A-hole. So retire already and then marry John Madden who so desperately in love with you. And then please leave us all alone.

• Great game for the Chargers. And they move on. They'll take the Steelers.

• The Giants would have been much better playing Arizona, but i still expect they'll beat Philly

• Today is the Eve of the Feast of the Magic Kings. We know it as Little Christmas. Traditionally in Spain, this was the day kids got presents. They would leave presents in your shoes. There will be a big parade. And i have a dinner party to go to. Imagine! They have 3 major holidays 3 weeks in a row.

• Work starts Wed, but Thurs is just a half sched. Things start full swing next week. Work???? What the hell is that?????

• Actually i can't wait to start earning cash again. I keep eating and needing a place to live even when i'm not making money. Strange but true.

• VALKYRIE is a great movie even though Tom Cruise is a nut job who thinks we are descended from aliens. What a Jackass.

• Let's have a little less worry about aliens coming back for us and a lot more worry about robots who have travelled back in time and what they want from me!!!!
  

Wrong Side of the Bed

Some people should die
That's just unconscious knowledge
-Jane's Addiction

I'm a little nervous about this new war in Gaza. This is not good. A great financial crisis often sparks hostilities and the Middle East is a powder keg. If Nevil Shute has taught us anything, which he hasn't, it's that World War III starts in the Middle East.

I have a major bone to Pick with Bruce Springsteen. He goes out there and spouts a liberal viewpoint and yet releases his greatest hits album exclusively to Wal-Mart, a very conservative mega-corp that is always in the news for treating their employees like crap. It seems to me the Boss is liberal until it comes to money. Which means you're not really liberal.

Who else is pissing me off?

Chema is cooking fish that smells like someone buried it in the sand for a month and then dug it up. The smell is hideous. I don't know how they eat it.

Anything else?

No. All else is cool.

All the Roadrunning

Well if you're inclined
To go up on the wall
It can only be fast and high
And those who don't like the danger
Soon find something different to try
When there's only a ringin' in your ears
And an echo down memory lane

And if it's all for nothing
All the roadrunning's
Been in vain
-Mark Knopfler

Life goes by quickly. It's amazing really.

Last night was a great time with Juan and those guys. They wanted to meet girls but they're shy when it comes to walking up to girls. After 15 years of sales, and years of cold calling, all i fear is global warming, nuclear war and bees. I fucking hate bees.

"I'll do it but my Spanish sucks, so i'm gonna need you close behind."

Cute blonde, her name was Belen. And bingo! She was a stewardess! We talked with her and her friends for hours. I talked with this one gal, Andrea, half the night. Way cute, shoulder length dark hair and the cutest ever hoop nose ring you ever saw. I never thought i'd find that hot, but it is.

So i got her number. When she left i said, "I'll call you."

"You better," She said.

You bet.

--------

Now i am off to feed Mumbai, as Rebound Girl calls him. I'll watch the Atletico - Valencia game at Jess' and then go meet Juan. They live uptown and that's Real Madrid territory, right next to the stadium. It might not be on in bars up there. And it's on regular TV.

But i need to get home before 7am. These Madrillenos are nuts.

The chamber of 32 doors

[Below: Asun (Staring girl), El Dude, y Alvaro all dressed up for New Year's]

One cannot gaze upon the sun for too long. -Guinnevere to Arthur, Excalibur

So Bombay is fed. I don't have to be the guy who killed the cat.

Dinner with Rebound Girl

i had some things still to say to her. I guess i thought we might somehow have a future. There's a strong connection between us. I can see it. I can feel it and it's mutual.

Feeding Bombay and dinner was very pleasant. During dinner i got to the figurative meat and potatoes.

"I still don't no what happened to us."

"Neither do I," She said.

"You ended things!" I said.

"You know, sometimes i look back on different things and i wonder why i did what i did. Maybe it's just the timing. I look back and think maybe i would have done things differently. But i never was as close to anyone as you," she said.

Too late. Too late.

Her current boyfirend, or whatever the hell she calls him, is still living with her. She truly is Rebound Girl; he is going through a divorce but is broke, so he is still living with her.

I'm not going to try and compete with a live-in boyfriend.

Much too late.

And then, completely without me knowing, he meets us in Chueca. It's his birthday and he wants to go out for drinks! For fuck sakes! It was the last thing i wanted to do but I'd look like a d-bag to duck out.

And Rebound Girl was eating it up. When Fernando (And he does seem like a nice enough guy) went to the bathroom she put her hand on my leg! She's insane. But you knew that already. But me, i never seem to learn. And then there's that moment when you look in the mirror and you see not a reflection, but the reality.

After countless searches
it was plain to see
my lunch on a fork
staring back at me
...if i could only
...if i could only
save myself.
-Wayward Platypus

And he previously had no idea that she and i were lovers. We were talking about the lack of sleep because of the new year, all in espanol, and he mentioned how Maria never sleeps much anyway. I said that it was true, that she never sleeps well. And then i saw that hiccup of clarity in his eyes. But at least he paid for the beers and they gave me a ride home.

So this next tune goes out to all you married folk; Sure, you may not have that spark you had all those years ago, but you have each other. You have your children, your love and all of those shared memories to get you through the icy patches. And it's not too late. One can always create new sparks.

As for me, i await to open the next door. And if Monty Hall has taught us anything, which he hasn't, it's that you never know what's behind the next door.

It's just the age
It's just a stage
We disengage
We turn the page.
-Rush

Food for Bombay

• I got in with Rebound Girl's help. The lock to one door is broken, but we eventually got it. Then we had to search for him for 30 minutes and finally found him under Mercedes bed, ungrateful bugger. So he is fed. I didn't want to be the cause of another cat's death.
  

Second verse, same as the first

Below: Annie y Fripp Watch Television


Happy New Year! Mine started quite auspiciously, in the dark, trying to get into Jess' house to feed Bombay. The key would not work. I got in the front door fine. The elevator was broken so i walked up to the 4th floor. But they don't mark the floors in this building. Or the doors. I walked back down and counted the floors this time as i walked up.

Her flat is 4 Izquierda (left) exterior. Not confusing at all for a place where nothing is marked! I got the second door open, but it seemed unlocked. That led to two unmarked doors. It was madness. I figured out which one was exterior but the key would not open the door. So then i walked back down again. I found their mailbox. Then i walked back up again. By now I'm sweating like Nell Carter. Now i can't get the outside door open. The key just turned around and around. It worked before! By now it's midnight and i can hear people celebrating. One of her neighbors was having a party so i asked if i had the right door. They said i did. I still couldn't get in, so i had no choice but to leave and head to the party. I felt terrible. It was so surreal too. We had tried all the keys before she left. But her building is a dump.

Jess is in Oregon. I am going back in a few hours with Rebound Girl in the hope that she will be able to help me with these fucking Spanish doors. Wish me luck. I really don't want to send her an email saying i can't get in. But i'll get a locksmith tomorrow if i must. Goddammit! Poor Bombay. He was fed on tues so he's still okay. But i have to get in there by tomorrow. I don't want to be like George Caztanza and have her cat die on my watch!

Does everyone stare the way I do?
I only stare this way at you
-The Police

The party was fun. I got home at 10:00 AM. There were lots of nice gals. One gal, Azun, just stares at you when she stops talking. It was very unnerving. I mentioned it to Juan and he was like "She does. She stares at you. It's strange."

At first, I was like.... does she like me? Bedroom eyes? We've only been talking for 30 minutes. She's staring like she wants me to kiss her. Stop staring at me! Say something gooddammit!

But no, she just likes to stare.

But when Juan introduced me to the more normal people, i would great them in Spanish and they'd say 'He speaks Spanish!" So i hung in there with the espanol, which was a bitch with the load annoying music. And they had screens that just kept showing highlights from Knebworth concerts in a loop - Genesis, Robert Plant with Jimmy Page and Pink Floyd. Over and over. We saw them all 4 times each. It was a nasty tease with all the crap they were playing. Again...surreal.

The party ended at 7, then we went out for one last beer at some other bar, Then we looked in vain for food and then went home. I made toast with olive oil and a glass of gaspacho and then went to bed.

2009 is on the books!