The chamber of 32 doors

[Below: Asun (Staring girl), El Dude, y Alvaro all dressed up for New Year's]

One cannot gaze upon the sun for too long. -Guinnevere to Arthur, Excalibur

So Bombay is fed. I don't have to be the guy who killed the cat.

Dinner with Rebound Girl

i had some things still to say to her. I guess i thought we might somehow have a future. There's a strong connection between us. I can see it. I can feel it and it's mutual.

Feeding Bombay and dinner was very pleasant. During dinner i got to the figurative meat and potatoes.

"I still don't no what happened to us."

"Neither do I," She said.

"You ended things!" I said.

"You know, sometimes i look back on different things and i wonder why i did what i did. Maybe it's just the timing. I look back and think maybe i would have done things differently. But i never was as close to anyone as you," she said.

Too late. Too late.

Her current boyfirend, or whatever the hell she calls him, is still living with her. She truly is Rebound Girl; he is going through a divorce but is broke, so he is still living with her.

I'm not going to try and compete with a live-in boyfriend.

Much too late.

And then, completely without me knowing, he meets us in Chueca. It's his birthday and he wants to go out for drinks! For fuck sakes! It was the last thing i wanted to do but I'd look like a d-bag to duck out.

And Rebound Girl was eating it up. When Fernando (And he does seem like a nice enough guy) went to the bathroom she put her hand on my leg! She's insane. But you knew that already. But me, i never seem to learn. And then there's that moment when you look in the mirror and you see not a reflection, but the reality.

After countless searches
it was plain to see
my lunch on a fork
staring back at me
...if i could only
...if i could only
save myself.
-Wayward Platypus

And he previously had no idea that she and i were lovers. We were talking about the lack of sleep because of the new year, all in espanol, and he mentioned how Maria never sleeps much anyway. I said that it was true, that she never sleeps well. And then i saw that hiccup of clarity in his eyes. But at least he paid for the beers and they gave me a ride home.

So this next tune goes out to all you married folk; Sure, you may not have that spark you had all those years ago, but you have each other. You have your children, your love and all of those shared memories to get you through the icy patches. And it's not too late. One can always create new sparks.

As for me, i await to open the next door. And if Monty Hall has taught us anything, which he hasn't, it's that you never know what's behind the next door.

It's just the age
It's just a stage
We disengage
We turn the page.
-Rush