Tales from America

Cape Cod is lovely this time of year. I love the cape. Next place i live needs to have some F*#king water. Southern Japan, perhaps.

Stories from the dashboard of America:

1. A friend of a friend was being tested for sleep apnea. They wake you up all night and monitor you. The next morning he went to leave and they told him 'no'. He said he had to go to work. They let him go. He fell asleep at the wheel and died. The hospital then went bankrupt so his widow can't sue but i imagined they made him sign himself out, which would dissolve all culpability.

Talk about F@*king irony! His poor widow. And maybe his kids. I never asked.

2. Bank of America keeps sending me mail to get me to sign up for services and credit cards. I'm not happy with the services i have now! Don't they read many sprawling ranting emails where i say the chairman's wife is crackwhore and the chairman is a cannibal? Both with lamb porn on the hard drive of their computers?

3. Brian Hirsch, the most incompetent lawyer in VA history (which is really a f$!cking statement) says i owe him $1,700. Now i have never received an itemized bill from him - just past due notices sent to my old address in McLean! I have not lived there for 18 months and he the Seester's address. I gave it to him the day we met. And people wonder why the economy blows!

Incompetence and indifferance
-Adrian Belew

4. A gallon of gas in Rhode Island is, 93 Octane, is $3.99! I was thinking about moving there until i saw bill boards saying that Ryan Seacrest has a local radio show.

5. The Toyota tripped 2,000 miles for this visit yesterday, 10 states. The northern tour is over. The last southern dates are this weekend. The last week is Mid-Atlantic, including CT, the red headed step child of New England.