Fire in the hole!

Come and join the party
Dress to kill
Won't you come and join the party
Dress to kill
Dress to kill.
-The Who

Thanksgiving, part II

Kristen and Sydney cooked their asses off on Saturday. They made 2 turkeys, yams with marshmallow, cauliflower, broccoli, Spanish tortilla, etc. There were no less than 30 people in and out over the course of the night. When the pavo (turkey) finally came out, it just sat there uncarved. “Do you want me to carve it?” I asked Kristen.

“Oh my god, Jay! Can you? I was wondering who the fuck was going to do it.”

And thus, my special purpose is revealed. I have been carving turkeys since i was 14 (i believe Mum taught me how). So the Grinch himself carved the Roast Beast. It was incredibly moist but seemed to have more bones than the ones i carve in America, so there was more breaking and snapping than normal. I think we get ones that are a little more cleaned up in the US.

A funny thing happened on the way to the table...
It was after dinner. Maria and I were talking about me trying to find people to jam with. She said she could sing.

“Really?”

“No but I've been on stage twice.”

“Singing?”

“No. Theater.”

“What did you play?”

(At this moment the music on Sydney's iPod fades) “I was a prostitute once....” is shouted across the room. Raised eyebrows go up next to us.

“That's what we thought,” says Sarah's boyfriend next to us. We laughed and laughed.

A funny thing happened on the way to the bathroom...

There was a line for the bathroom. It was Sarah's birthday (a different one than previously mentioned – there are like 4 American Sarahs . She was 24. She was fussing about something and Maria, a little drunk and a lot worn out from so many different English speakers, says “You don't look 44!”

Kristen guffaws and buckles over. Sarah mocks hurt but understands it's just a mistake. But la Profesora is quick and to cover herself says “Sorry. I was looking at jay and thought....”

“Whoa!” screams Kristen. Now the entire hallway is laughing their faces off.
“Mi Corazon es roto! (My heart is broken)” i yell.

Later Kristen says to me, “She is funny, and quick!”

“Kristen, she is so funny in English, I can't even imagine how fucking funny she is in Spanish.”

I hope to know someday.

Sometimes swirling waters drag you down
Knowing how to swim doesn't mean you'll never drown
Come the storm you hold in fear
Whoever's by your side
Sometimes you're just drifting on the tide
Dive into me, into the raging sea
Follow your heart, down where it's deep and it's dark
Dive into me, into the healing sea
Put your life into my hands and take the chance
Dive into me
-Big Country

Nov 27
We said we'd all go down together
-Billy Joel

I am weary. So much war and bloodshed with the Empire. The peace process drags on. The losses on both sides are catastrophic. 13 months of battle later i have lost my taste for this game. But i shall see it to the last, like Macbeth.

Live free or die
-New Hampshire license plate.

Another ludicrous offer from Darth. Another fuck up by my lawyer. The Empire counter offered on the 21st and i only got it today when I followed up because they used jay@momentumconsult.com when I informed them i changed it months ago (Brian gave it to an assistant and my file was never updated.

We said we'd all go down in leather
-El Dude

It's hard to remember not being in the process of getting divorced. Nunca mas (Never again) am i getting married. Only i have a kid with some women. Once you have a kid, getting married is like peeing in the neighbor's birdbath after you've banged his wife.

We said we'd all go down on Heather
-El Dude